Relationships are unexplainable experiences shared between two. They are the perfect reflection of our struggles, from the best to the worse. When dealing with anxiety within a relationship, the magic felt between couples can quickly erode. Understanding your partner whilst being patient can provide a sanction to heal when dealing with anxiety. Needless to say, there are ways to manage hurdles which may present when working with anxiety.
Anxiety can be emotionally draining for your partner, to ensure your relationship is maintained, ensure your partner is shown attention, gratitude, affection, touch and communication. Maintaining a balance between love and care against the adverse effects of anxiety is the key to ensuring your partner’s happiness while deterring bitterness and resentment.
People with anxiety tend to require constant emotional support from their partners. This, in turns, causes their partners to become reluctant in sharing their burden as it appears minor compared to the struggles of their counterpart. Be direct to your partner and reassure them that you too can be the support they need. Ask, hold and touch, let your partners know that you’re able to be the shoulder they lean on.
Anxious thoughts can be extremely personal and detrimental. Being able to open up your thoughts to your partner is an essential aspect of intimacy. Keeping things to yourself has a way of widening the gap between two people. Be open to your partner and let them know what you’re thinking; trust your partner and let yourself be able to move forward with them.
Reassurance can come as a double-edged sword, too much and it can appear as neediness and too little, will cause you to become doubtful. Allow yourself to ask for reassurance but also allow yourself to be loved spontaneously and without prompting. Let your partner allow themselves to show you love naturally.
Anxiety can affect people in different ways, in some, a constantly need for reassurance. In others, anxiety can cause them to withdraw, to lessen their vulnerability to breakups. To love someone, and to be intimate, you need to be vulnerable. Allowing yourself to trust your partner, allows them come closer to you than anyone else.
Allow yourself to put your guards down, trust your partner and let them in on the most fragile, messy and untamed part of you, because this part of you will always be okay to the person that loves you.
Doubt, jealousy, suspicion and insecurity, these are the feeling caused by anxiety. Remind yourself that just because you are worried, that doesn’t mean there’s anything to worry about. See your relationship for what it is and not what you’re worried about, the truth that you are loved and let that be the reason that holds you. Avoid projecting your anxiety into your relationship and seeing that as the truth.
Ensure a clear line of communication is kept between you and your partner. When it comes to decision making and difficult issues, be open for discussion, these topic won’t subside unless it’s properly communicated. Trust in yourself, as well as your partner, to be able to cope with making difficult decisions. Relationships are built on trust and being able to communicate on any topic ensures the trust between you and partner is maintained.
Allow your partner to be able to place an input into important topics, without seeing it as being negative, to maintain a balance within your relationship.
Allow your partner to understand your thoughts and feelings. Talk about your anxiety and how it affects you, your work, your relationship and your partner. People change, relationships change and so do our stories, it is okay to talk about how you feel and what you’re thinking. Allowing your partner to empathise with you, will only bring you closer, this provides them with an opportunity to understand you and your story.
Anxiety can come as a sudden onset, ensure you’re able to communicate with your partner on when and how it happens. Open up to your partner and explain what makes you anxious. An understanding partner will be able to accommodate, whether the trigger is caused by crowds, strangers, loud music or tardiness, by communicating the triggers of your anxiety, your partner will be able to understand and work with you when it happens.
As a way of coping, you may be tempted to press for a quick fix to a problem within your relationship. You might become frustrated with your partner’s commitment to a course of action. Be open to ideas, what you see as a problem may appear differently to your partner. Stop, take a moment and don’t assume the worse of your partner. There are no quick fix to any problems, let your partner digest and and work with you on solving issues that may arise.
Be patient and don’t assume your partner lacks commitment or disregards the issue as important, issues arising within a relationship will take time to resolve.
Looking after yourself isn’t selfish, it ensures your investing time in maintaining your own anxiety, after all you cannot expect your partner to support you through your anxiety without supporting yourself. Include your partner in your programs, whether it’s a healthy diet, meditation or exercise. What’s healthy for you is also beneficial for your partner, which also means you’ll be doing things together.
Anxiety can become overwhelming within a relationship, allow your partner to draw boundaries on your anxiety. Boundaries are a way to allow your partner to remain themselves, it allows time for them to recuperate rather than being drained from repetition. Talking about your problems is healthy, however, repeated issues over short periods of time can cause an issues within itself. Know that your partner loves you and allowing them space to be themselves without being absorbed in your worries helps your partner maintain their emotional resources and keeps the relationship strong.
Life shouldn’t just be about worrying, ensure you’re able to share a common ground of laughter and enjoyment. Spending time together and sharing moments that make you happy will strengthen the bond between you and your partner.
Be reminded as to why you fell in love with each other.